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Finally, a Pro-Death Candidate

Posted Tuesday, March 25, 2008, at 10:08 AM

(Photo)
Dr. Jack Kevorkian, known to his friends as "Dr. Death" (and to his nieces and nephews as "Uncle Death"), has announced his candidacy for Congress in the 9th District of Michigan. We all remember Dr. Kevorkian for his principled stand on his supposed right to help people kill themselves. That made his name a household word and got him convicted of second degree murder. Now he's out. How time flies!

There's no rule against convicted felons running for Congress in Michigan, so Dr. Kevorkian's way onto the ballot is clear. He's running as an independent, presumably to the relief of the two major parties, who provide enough material for Jay Leno as it is. His platform is built upon support for the 9th Amendment, which (as I'm sure you all know) states, "The enumeration in the Constitution, of certain rights shall not be construed to deny or disparage others retained by the people." This is the amendment which, as was clearly the intent of the Framers of the Constitution, allows, among other things, Dr. Kevorkian to kill you if you want him to. Or maybe even if you just annoy him. I'm not entirely clear on that.

After his release from prison, it is my understanding that Dr. Kevorkian drifted a bit, unsure what to do with his life or how to get back to making a living. He tried trading on his fame as a medical man to get an "Ask Dr. Kevorkian" health-related radio call in show, but that sort of fizzled when his reply to a caller who said his head cold made him miserable was, "Do you have any rat poison in the house?"

His attempts to start a musical career also ran into trouble when lawyers told him he could not perform under the name he had chosen for his band. "Grateful Dead" had already been taken.

But he's on his feet now, and forging ahead. It is another inspiring, uniquely American story of personal re-invention. This is a country where a guy who has been knocked down can always get back up and climb back and become a productive member of society.

Or failing that, a member of Congress.


Comments
Showing comments in chronological order
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General George S. Patton said, "What counts is not how hard you fall, but how high you bounce after you hit bottom."

-- Posted by Johnny Yuma on Wed, Mar 26, 2008, at 6:42 PM

He would undoubtedly cast one vote for himself, but what will it say about our present moral and political climate if this felon receives more than that one vote?

-- Posted by windjammer1 on Wed, Jul 30, 2008, at 9:50 AM


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