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Celebrated Idiots

Posted Tuesday, August 26, 2008, at 11:35 AM

During Tropical Storm Fay in Florida last week, a few geniuses decided it would be a good time to go kite surfing. If it is fun with a ten mile-per-hour wind, then it stands to reason that it will be six times as much fun with a sixty mile-per-hour wind, right? Of course, people generally get away unhurt from even the most bone-headed of actions--if this was not true, the population would be much lower. This time, however, to what should have been the surprise of absolutely nobody, one of the airborne airheads got snatched up by a gust, blown across the street and smacked into a building. For some reason, he survived.

You might think that this would not be particularly newsworthy, and you would be right. It is a sort of "man sticks hand into beehive, is stung by bee" sort of story. Something of the deep and abiding interest and edification of a story about a toddler jamming a lima bean up his nose. The difference was that somebody was pointing a camera at Mr. Projectile when he took his ride. So he became a national celebrity.

I have personally done a few stupid things in my time (though nothing quite as stupid as kite surfing during a nascent hurricane). When these things were over and done with, I usually speculated on the possible bad outcomes that I dodged and sometimes reviewed the reasoning (clearly flawed in retrospect) which led me to do such an idiotic thing. Usually I thanked my lucky stars that nobody (or at least only a few people) knew I had been so stupid. One thing that it did not occur to me to do was to go on a personal appearance tour.

I have to admit to being baffled by the idea that notoriety--specifically being on television--can be so attractive that it literally doesn't matter to a person what the cause of it is. People cheerfully admit to all sorts of stupidity, debauchery and downright evil just to see themselves on television. Sometimes they commit the acts specifically to get on television. (I don't accuse Mr. Kite of that. He obviously had no ulterior motives for his original actions beyond those inherent to any moron.) I have seen myself on television, and I didn't find it to be all that uplifting an experience. I don't see the attraction. (Mainly I was just struck by the size of my nose. Could they possibly have been using a wide-angle lens? That might account for it.)

Oh well. It takes a lot of crap to fill up twenty-four hours a day of non-stop television. So as long as television is desperate for any sort of video and people are desperate for any sort of exposure, I guess we'll all be kept happy, both the viewers and the viewed.

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these all news channels aggravate the poop out of me with these "breaking news" stories that is a house fire in trenton, pa...and no one injured. the same goes for the fender benders--that is just not news. exxxccccuuuseee me!

of course, our daily paper tries to use the front page up with several quite large photo's, which is okay, we just need it to be on page 1 of a "b" secton.

put some of the reporters to work instead of just drawing their pay would be one way of curing the problem! there's not a day that goes by that the reporters should let go by without checking with the mayor (city & county), the courts, the election commission, the county court clerk, our state senator and representatives, and even the governor and hiway patrol--actually get interested in their work or what should be interesting for them if they want to be journalist. check to see how many city/county/state employees it takes to dig a hole--get a picture of that! that would be news! from what i have observed on many occasions it takes 1 or 2 to work and 3 to 5 to supervise.

the sports page could show the sec standings, the nfl results, and the pro baseball standings--but no, they want us to buy another paper somewhere else to find out that kind of information! a decent tv listing in the sunday paper would be nice. it (tv listing) would be as good of an advertising tool as we have. it would actually be in the living room or den for someone to see for a whole week at a time. rather than ending up as fish wrap or in the trash can.

-- Posted by closerlook on Sat, Aug 30, 2008, at 8:47 PM

Teutsch, I enjoy reading your rambling writing and I look forward to watching and listening to your Hal Holbrook imitation on October second.

-- Posted by Johnny Yuma on Tue, Sep 2, 2008, at 2:00 PM

Hal who? You chose your screen name very well, Mr. Treason. I'd get in a huff over that if I weren't so lazy. No white suits or rocking chairs in this show, sorry.

-- Posted by kenteutsch on Wed, Sep 3, 2008, at 9:05 AM

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